No. 608

The moment after Mike realized that his boss was a snake-man, he felt like kicking himself for not realizing it sooner. The forked tongue. The beady, lidless eyes. It was all so obvious, in retrospect.

Now, Mike had to figure out a way to kill the monster without getting charged with murder.

 

If Mike goes to the library to research the perfect crime, choose number 1.

If Mike tries to goad his boss into attacking him so that he can claim self-defence, choose number 2.

 

1. Mike chose not to confront his boss that evening. Surely the library would have ways to fight snakes. What Mike should have done was use Google, because he was hit by a car and killed just across the street from the library, where, curiously, all the books about killing snakes had already been checked out, anyway.

 

2. Mike crept up behind his boss with a broken-ruler stake held just behind his back. “Hey, you giant, ugly reptile, I know your secret!” he shouted from just outside his boss’ office door.

Mike’s boss slithered out to meeting him. “Well, that’s too bad, Mike. I had you on the short-list for promotion. Now, I guess I’ll have to eat you.”

Mike turned his head to make sure the security camera caught what happened next, so that he would be acquitted of any crime. The hesitation was his greatest mistake. His boss lashed forward with surprising speed for a man, but relatively slow reflexes for a snake. Mike was first bitten by venomous fangs, then devoured whole, but still conscious. According to the official account, Mike had left to go backpacking in Europe.